Observation

Observation of my Roommate and his Girlfriend

On April 14, 2010, I observed two people; Roommate and Girlfriend. The observation took place at Westwood, a local restaurant, beginning at 5:34 p.m. and ending observation at 6:15 p.m. I happened to be working and they were unaware of it so it created for a fun night. I ended up serving their table for the evening, enabling myself to observe them closely. The restaurant hadn’t been very busy this night so it was easy to observe, leaving them one of three tables in the smoking section, normally filled with eight. Even though I knew them both very well, I could tell they were out to eat to spend some time together so I let them have their space. Time and time again, I would check up on them and create some small talk but nothing into a deep conversation. Along with the outside light fading, the lighting indoors was dim, making the dining experience feel more quiet and intimate. The background noise was filled with a light roar of other group’s conversations, and a jazz station played quietly from the speakers overhead.

Roommate Observation
The Roommate was a male around the age of 22. He was tall and thin with a short blonde haircut and brown eyes. The first nonverbal observation I made of the Roommate was the way he was dressed. He had on a green stripped-collared, button-down shirt and a pair of dark jeans. His clothing was coordinated with a pair of brown suede shoes. It seemed as if he took time to put this outfit together. This was quiet interesting because he usually doesn’t dress up to often, so I knew it was a special time for the two of them. Another nonverbal observation I made was his smell. As soon as I approached the table, I caught a subtle whiff of male cologne. The smell, however, was not overbearing.
The next few observations involve his interactions with his Girlfriend. My roommate was consistently reaching across the table and holding his Girlfriend’s hand. Whenever possible, he was touching her in some way—whether holding her hand or rubbing her arm. Another observation was his use of personal space. Upon walking to the table, Roommate had his arm around his Girlfriend and was holding her close. There was no personal space needed for Roommate in this instance. A fourth observation is the eye movement. He would hold deep and prolonged eye contact with his Girlfriend whenever he was talking to her, or vice versa. As an observer, I could tell my Roommate was deeply involved in the conversation at all times. I also took note of my Roommate’s facial expression throughout the observation. Roommate was generally smiling throughout the evening, clearly enjoying himself. I could observe many times of laughter, and took note of no negative expressions. There was one this that was pondering my mind as the night went on, where was his phone? My Roommate is addicted to his phone and I hadn’t seen it yet.
Along the lines of laughter, another observation I observed was Roommate’s tone. I was able to observe this closely walking by their table several times throughout the night. Roommate had a deep, gentle voice that stayed at a fairly steady low volume throughout dinner. He spoke fairly fast, but I think he was simply excited to be with his Girlfriend; trying to fit in as much as he could. His laughter was low and hearty, but stayed near the volume he spoke. He also used a lot of hand gestures. His stories were filled with help from his hands and arms. He was quite animated and looked excited to be talking. At one point it looked as if he was trying to describe a house using hand gestures.
One last nonverbal observation I will mention is that of Roommate’s posture. He generally sat hunched over the table, rarely sitting up straight. Combined with the other nonverbal observations, this posture suggests he wanted to be as near to Girlfriend as possible.

Roommate's Girlfriend Observation
The Girlfriend was a female around the age of 21. She was about 5 ½ feet tall with a slender build and shoulder-length brown hair. The first nonverbal observation I made about Girlfriend was the way she dressed. She had a knee-length black skirt paired with a light blue sweater. This outfit suggested she was dressed up for a special event. However, her black flip-flops brought a casual side to her outfit, which I view as having a laid-back personality.
Several of the nonverbal observations I made involved her interactions with my Roommate. She was very touchy, always reaching for, or holding, Roommate’s hand. I translated these nonverbal cues to show her affection for Roommate. As was with Roommate, Girlfriend also had little need for personal space. Upon walking to the table, she had her arms wrapped around Roommate’s waist. I also noticed this same behavior when leaving the restaurant. A similar nonverbal observation was made with Girlfriend’s posture. She seemed to be leaning over the table the majority of the time, rather than sitting back in her seat. I saw this as her wanting to be as close to my Roommate as possible. Her posture, along with her lack of personal space, and touchy actions, shows that she cares for Roommate.
Girlfriend’s eye contact was not as intense as that of Roommate’s. Girlfriend would always look at Roommate when he was talking, but the contact was not as prolonged as Roommate’s was towards Girlfriend. I found that Girlfriend would look around at her surroundings more and did not seem as involved with the conversation at all times like Roommate. I could tell, however, that she did care for and enjoyed being around Roommate.
Girlfriend had a soft, high pitched voice. She giggled quite often. She spoke concretely with well thought out sentences. Roommate seemed to be doing most of the talking, leaving Girlfriend listening for the majority of the dinner. This may be one reason why her eye contact would bounce around. She had a friendly voice that was distinct among the other voices around her. A last observation, which accompanies Girlfriend’s giggling, was her facial expressions. I could tell from the smile on her face that she was enjoying her dinner with Roommate. Her smile was genuine. This was mirrored between both of them, which strongly suggested they both enjoyed their time together.

CLOSURE
In conclusion, it appears Roommate and Girlfriend was on a date. From the way they were dressed to the way they laughed, it was apparent they were out to celebrate some alone time together. The observations made it clear to me that they enjoy their time together and enjoyed their dinner and the company that particular night. Their similar nonverbal cues of holding hands, lack of personal space, posture, and happy facial expression confirmed they were on a date and that they care for each other. I am confident in my conclusion because the nonverbal cues were so clear. This was very interesting time for me because as a roommate of Roommate and a Friend of Roommate. I didn’t want to be nosey during their time together for this special evening. So as the server I was, I acted just like any other server would, along with noting my observations. The most intriguing observation to be was the non use of cell phone. Living with Roommate for two years and have know for about four years, I was shocked that he didn’t take his phone out once. This was quiet odd for me because Roommate is always on his phone. My assumption would be that it was a special time together and they could of said no use of phones while out to eat. I enjoyed observing and serving this couple

Like I said in my closure this was a very interesting night for a few reasons. The first is I was working at the restaurant they decided to spend their special evening at. Which later to find out they were celebrating their anniversary of dating for two years. I thought that this was a very interesting observation on the couple because it was very different then how I normally see them act when they are at our house. I truly was honestly shocked that their relationship was very strong like this, I was impressed! I also later found out my assumption about them not having their phones was correct. They wanted to enjoy the night together and not have the phone be a distraction to their special night. The next day when my roommate was asking me how the night finished off after he left, I made mention to him about not having his phone and he said I simply just left it at home. He agreed that it was very difficult and he caught himself reaching for his phone in his pocket but it was nowhere to be found. In my observation of the two at dinner I was very aware of the nonverbal communication and how important it is to have a healthy relationship. In my next log I will be talking about nonverbal communication in depth.